Chapter 4
Effort over grades? What a concept! How do we recognize effort over a number grade if that is what students and parents place all the importance on? Unfortunately, this will take time. I think that if we learn to do this as soon as kids come to school, it is our best chance to alter everyone's thought patterns and move them into a "growth mindset." If we start giving specific praise and feedback in Kindergarten, modeling for parents, providing this type of feedback in journals, papers, etc, there is a higher likelihood that it will sink in before upper elementary, when things start to get more challenging. I believe we need to show teachers and parents, through education, WHY it is more meaningful to praise effort over grades. We say it is important, but do we really understand the impact that it will have on young minds later in life, if we choose to only reward good grades?
In the last few years, I have seen many students who show giftedness in one area over another. For example, I have a student this year who qualified for GATES, but the recommendation came from his math teacher, due to his performance in her class, not mine. Don't get me wrong, he is a high achiever for me, writes well, tries hard, but I would never have recommended him for the GATES program. His struggle was more that he just felt inferior to others in his class when it came to language arts. He was used to getting the top math score, knowing every answer, and being accelerated in that setting. When he and I conferenced, I just reminded him that we all have areas we feel stronger in, but that doesn't mean he can't grow. We worked on specific strategies for organization and elaboration. I wanted him to understand that once he sees how far he has come in writing, he won't care about the grade. Sure enough- that is what happened. The students wrote an end of year essay about what they were most proud of - he chose writing! I was beyond excited for HIM! When he read his assignment out loud, he was beaming----- And, it was the best thing he had written all year!
Chapter 5
This chapter was an "aha" for me! As a mom, wife, friend, daughter, and teacher..... I recognize that I am not always be the easiest person to be around. Why you ask? I am a self-oriented perfectionist. I hold myself to high standards that, although sometimes allow me to accomplish good work, most often just keep me feeling unsatisfactory and stressed. I need for things around me to be in perfect working order, I need to feel in control of almost every situation, and I need to feel like I did the best job I could. Otherwise, I suffer from anxiety and a dismal feeling of failure. But, wait, that is not all. I am also an other-oriented perfectionist. Yes, that is right... my family gets to enjoy this, as well. I figure, at least I am consistent. If I am going to hold others to the highest expectation, the least I can do, is expect the same from myself. So, how can I help myself, while lightening the load on my loved ones? I think a great place to start is learning to accept compliments, give them more often to others, and remind myself that it is "ok" to make mistakes and not be perfect ---- I need to mean it when I say that, if I expect my family to believe it, too. The last thing I want is to "infect" those I love. I feel like I have a window of opportunity to make a difference with my GATES son, who is going into 8th grade. He reminds me so much of myslef --- I truly want to model changes in my life, so that he can experience life without so much unnecessary stress.
Effort over grades? What a concept! How do we recognize effort over a number grade if that is what students and parents place all the importance on? Unfortunately, this will take time. I think that if we learn to do this as soon as kids come to school, it is our best chance to alter everyone's thought patterns and move them into a "growth mindset." If we start giving specific praise and feedback in Kindergarten, modeling for parents, providing this type of feedback in journals, papers, etc, there is a higher likelihood that it will sink in before upper elementary, when things start to get more challenging. I believe we need to show teachers and parents, through education, WHY it is more meaningful to praise effort over grades. We say it is important, but do we really understand the impact that it will have on young minds later in life, if we choose to only reward good grades?
In the last few years, I have seen many students who show giftedness in one area over another. For example, I have a student this year who qualified for GATES, but the recommendation came from his math teacher, due to his performance in her class, not mine. Don't get me wrong, he is a high achiever for me, writes well, tries hard, but I would never have recommended him for the GATES program. His struggle was more that he just felt inferior to others in his class when it came to language arts. He was used to getting the top math score, knowing every answer, and being accelerated in that setting. When he and I conferenced, I just reminded him that we all have areas we feel stronger in, but that doesn't mean he can't grow. We worked on specific strategies for organization and elaboration. I wanted him to understand that once he sees how far he has come in writing, he won't care about the grade. Sure enough- that is what happened. The students wrote an end of year essay about what they were most proud of - he chose writing! I was beyond excited for HIM! When he read his assignment out loud, he was beaming----- And, it was the best thing he had written all year!
Chapter 5
This chapter was an "aha" for me! As a mom, wife, friend, daughter, and teacher..... I recognize that I am not always be the easiest person to be around. Why you ask? I am a self-oriented perfectionist. I hold myself to high standards that, although sometimes allow me to accomplish good work, most often just keep me feeling unsatisfactory and stressed. I need for things around me to be in perfect working order, I need to feel in control of almost every situation, and I need to feel like I did the best job I could. Otherwise, I suffer from anxiety and a dismal feeling of failure. But, wait, that is not all. I am also an other-oriented perfectionist. Yes, that is right... my family gets to enjoy this, as well. I figure, at least I am consistent. If I am going to hold others to the highest expectation, the least I can do, is expect the same from myself. So, how can I help myself, while lightening the load on my loved ones? I think a great place to start is learning to accept compliments, give them more often to others, and remind myself that it is "ok" to make mistakes and not be perfect ---- I need to mean it when I say that, if I expect my family to believe it, too. The last thing I want is to "infect" those I love. I feel like I have a window of opportunity to make a difference with my GATES son, who is going into 8th grade. He reminds me so much of myslef --- I truly want to model changes in my life, so that he can experience life without so much unnecessary stress.
Comments
Post a Comment